Virtual balls of STEEL

So,  I had started this blog a couple of weeks ago and never got around to finishing it. And then today happened...so I decided to start over...so same subject new content...[even though you never saw the original content LOL]

Anywho About today...basically, long story short, My husband made a comment on a Facebook status today. The subject was about marching band. A person who disagreed with something he had to say proceeded to talk mad shit about my husband in all aspects of his life...because he disagreed with his statement about band.

Now mind you, my hunny has rather thick skin so while it didn't bother him per say, it still reminded me of the blog that I started a couple weeks ago. It brings up the subject of this blog....virtual balls of steel aka keyboard confidence.

As I engage on my various social network sites, I have noticed two trends: 1. People are insanely rude on the internet, 2. The things that they tend to say we all know for the most part they would not say in person. I'll start with start with my first point....

People are insanely rude on the internet...

We all know it. And to me, it is unfortunate. It's as if people forget that people are REAL people. The things that they say, the comments that are made are cruel at best. I was talking to one of my best friends earlier today and we were discussing how hate and evil isn't the "norm" or the "default".

What I mean is that humans are wired to love not hate. Hate for the most part is something that is learned or observed. I have several justifications for this hypothesis. I'll only talk about one of them here...otherwise we would be here all day.

One of my jobs requires me to monitor infant development... That sounds really fancy doesn't it?!?!?
Really, I just get paid to play with babies LOL. I know I'm lucky! I hope I can find something similar when I move to Nashville.

Anywho back to the subject. One of the developmental tasks for my babies (mind you most of my clients are under the age of 2) is whether or not they hug or feed a stuffed animal. As they get older, they are expected to try and console an person who appears to be sad or hurt amongst many other things.

Now, emotions are not something that you can teach. You can assign a word to describe an emotion but the fact of the matter is,  you can not "teach" someone how to feel if that makes sense. That is something that occurs within our brain that we actually have no control over (though we CAN control how we respond to a particular emotion)

So the fact that something like showing affection is considered a developmental milestone allows me to believe that we are naturally wired to be kind towards each other. This means that there is something that has happened to our innate nature that has gone horribly wrong. I do not know what this something is.  But I do have a hunch on what is contributing to it

Group Think...

According to the World English Dictionary, group think is defined as a tendency within organizations or society to promote or establish the view of the predominant group. Now if you take the word organization with a grain of salt given social networks aren't organizations per say, this definition is applicable in describing how we interact on the internet today.

There is always going to be one person who has something negative to say.

However, it seems that people are quick to jump on board and utterly destroy people on the internet. I've seen people talk about everything from how a person looks (something they have ZERO control over like facial features) to the food that they choose to prepare to eat. It's as if feelings and remorse are ignored on the internet

It is a lot easier for people to be mean when they see others are already doing it. Point blank period. Just the same way it's easier to say nice things if everyone else is saying them. There are a myriad of reasons why people behave in this way but alas that is not the subject right now.

The point is the phenomena of group think will have a person go against what they know in their heart and mind is right simply necause everyone is doing something differently. Classic studies have already been done that show people will choose the wrong answer just to go along with what the group believes is correct...just to fit in

Now on to the 2nd Point

 The things that they tend to say we all know for the most part they would not say in person.

Does this apply to everyone? No but does this apply to many people? abso fuckin lutely. We've all seen it... Those friends you are following who you know IRL (in real life) and their social media life is nothing like their real one. The ones who brag about things you know they've never done.

Ive noticed that people seem to be more....aggressive for want of a better word on the internet than they are IRL. People threaten to beat, maim, injure and kill people on a daily basis via comments etc. However, if all the threats of violence were true reflections of people's behaviors...we would have a lot more death and destruction IMO

Also, If people were REALLY comfortable saying in person the mean things that they do online, lets just say the world would be a lonelier place because a lot of people would be friendless.  How do I know people aren't saying these things in real life? Because Ive seen people on numerous occasions wish harm on an innocent baby....How many times have you actually heard someone say something like that to a person's face?

And ya know, we as a population need to get these "internet personas" in check quick fast and in a hurry. The  effects of our terrible etiquette is 2 fold. I will begin with the least obvious. When you meet an "internet persona" you only know what the person chooses to share with you. In a nutshell, you could be talkin shit to someone who doesn't take that type of stuff lightly...Or an emotionally unstable serial killer

Maybe because of your snarky comments they wanted physical retribution. What if they clicked on your social network profile and was able to find out everything about you and where you frequent because you use the location app. Maybe this person has an anger management problem.


You have no idea what could lie behind the computer keys. So for your own personal safety...You should be wary of who you choose to harass. It really could be anybody...

The 2nd effect of these virtual balls of steel is that THESE ARE PEOPLE YOU ARE TALKING TOO!!! THEY HAVE FEELINGS....THAT YOU ARE ACTUALLY HURTING. Its not just the internet, this is someone's life.

Cyber bullying is out of control. Somehow the accessibility of the internet has made people think that it is OK to talk to people any old kind of way with ZERO consideration as to how what they say can affect others all in the name of expressing THEIR opinion....We talk about celebrities, we talk about strangers, we talk about our "friends" we talk about everyone


We've all got a responsibility to improve the way that we interact on the internet...Now am I perfect? No. I laugh at some of the pictures that come across my timeline, sometimes I truly cant help it. But will I "like" or share said picture? NEVER!!!!! Because by doing that, I am doing nothing but continuing the cycle. As I stated earlier, you cant control what you feel, You can control how you choose to respond.

I'll close with this. You can choose which side you want to be on. You can be that one person who leaves a positive remark on photo riddled with negative comments...Or if that is too much for you, you could always simply remain neutral and not like or share the photo, comment etc.